Podcast Episode 46:
Gifts/Purchases

When making purchases for our children, it can be easy to be tempted and hard to stay strong.  This episode discusses some ways to avoid purchases that you’ll later regret!



Transcript:
Decoding Learning Differences with Kimberlynn Lavelle. This episode is gifts and purchases. And in this episode, as we're approaching the holiday season, if you are listening, as this goes live, I wanted to take a minute to kind of talk about how we're choosing to spend our money, because we often get tempted into buying things, thinking that, oh, it's such a great idea,

such a great deal, such a great investment, or it's so cool or whatever. And sometimes we're doing it for our child's sake. We want our child to benefit from these gifts or the curriculum that's on sale or whatever it is that we're, we're doing it in our minds for our children. And I just want you guys to take a moment and really push back.

And honestly, I'm recording this episode for myself as much as for anyone else. I'm hoping others also benefit from it. This is something I'm constantly happening to walk myself through and remind myself because quite honestly, I love shopping and I am a sucker for a good deal. So if something's on sale, I have a hard time avoiding it. So I go through some different questions when I'm considering whether or not to make a purchase.

The first question that I go through, which often stops me, and it's almost embarrassing how often I was tempted by something that I really don't have any need for, because I asked myself, do I already have something that will do this same thing that will serve this same purpose? I also returned things after I bought them, because I really started thinking through,

you know, actually I could just use this instead and then I'll return it. But it's even better. If you can stop yourself before you bring it into your home. So do I already have something that will serve the same purpose? One kind of silly example that comes to mind first is because I have young kids. I wanted a bar that was hanging to hang down low so that they in their closet so that they can access their own clothing.

There's not up super high where the it's like naturally installed. So I was at Lowe's grabbing some of their stuff and I saw some thing extensions that hang down low. And I was like, oh, okay. I grabbed that. And I ended up returning it because once I got home, I was like, wait, I already have this other bar.

It's a clothing line, like bar that came with this shelving set. But we don't use the bar because we use the shelves there. I can just use this and like just suspend it myself. So that's what I'm doing. I don't, I returned it. The other thing, which wasn't a huge purchase, but it was, but all those little things can add up.

Right? I'm always tempted. They like, I don't know if you guys do any of the wooden toy stuff, there's so many beautiful things and you can't ever have too many, right? Except that you can so easily. So there are these little mandalas loose toys, loose parts, loose parts play, which can be very beneficial, but I've already invested in a set of loose parts that was expensive.

So I have to constantly remind myself, I don't need these other loose parts because I already have these loose parts and we can always collect loose parts, which is actually way more fun to collect little rocks, little acorns, little, whatever out while we're out exploring. So sometimes it's not even that it's something that I've already purchased. It can serve the same purpose.

Sometimes it's something that is just naturally existing or I'm reusing a cardboard box that something came in to now store this stuff. Or I, you know, I'm, I'm finding new uses for things. So one of the things that I try to do when I'm like, oh, I need blank. I try to think, okay, what else? Like,

what are the characteristics of the thing that I need? What else do I have in my house already? That would, that has those same characteristics. So if I need a container of some kind, what other containers do I have now? Maybe I have this vision of this beautiful, whatever container, what else do I already have that I can just use instead?

So that's, this was a big one. Do I already have something that will serve the same purpose? Next question, will it spark new joy? Sometimes we don't buy something because it, we need it to be functional. We buy something because it's gorgeous. But is it really going to like constantly spark joy? Or is it like, oh, it's so beautiful.

I have to have it. And then once you have it, you're going to stop appreciating it pretty quickly is that happens a lot. I get like so excited to have something. And then once I have it, I'm like, I didn't really need to have it. I realized I really just liked it, but I don't need to have everything. I like,

I can appreciate that it exists and keep it at the store and let someone else have it. I've followed these gorgeous Waldorf dolls. And there's a particular company. They post on Instagram every week. These gorgeous stalls. I love every single one of them, but the benefit to loving every single one of them is I can't buy any of them because how would I choose?

Plus they like sell out instantly. Like the second they're on the website, they're gone because they're gorgeous. And so I totally understand why people everywhere are buying them and maybe one day I'll own one of them. But in the meantime, I just appreciate that they exist and I follow them and I look at them like, wow, such a gorgeous dog.

I know it seems silly, but I like them really pretty. Okay. So does it have a place? Let me go back just a little bit. I kind of, I feel like I went through that one a little bit too fast. Well, it sparked new joy. So I was kind of an example of sometimes we don't need something to come into our house because it's not going to keep sparking joy.

Right. And maybe it would like maybe one day I'll buy one of those dolls and it'll spark joy every time I see it totally possible. Maybe it won't, I don't know. But a cheaper version of the same thing will probably not spark joy. So that's where sometimes investing in the more expensive thing is a better choice if you plan for it and budget for it and save for it.

But other times I can just look at them on the computer, on the phone and just appreciate that they exist. And that's enough other things I can't appreciate as much if I don't have them in my hand. And there are things in my home that every single time I touch them, they sparked joy. Okay. My coffee mug, which I guess is a tea mug because I don't drink coffee actually.

Mostly just drink Rasa. That's what it's in it right now. So this mug I got at a really cute tea shop that actually has closed. Now, they're, they are online, but they've their physical shop closed. And I loved it so much. Like I immediately had to have it. Right. You know, I love the ocean. If you pay attention at all,

you figured that out. I love the ocean. So it has this like gorgeous sea horse that handle, right. And these like beautiful blue. It's like, it's not painted it's in the actual clay or however they made it. I don't know how they made it. I'm not, but I love it. Every time I touch it, it sparks joy.

I am glad that I bought it. And it's my one month. Like I don't, I don't have a whole bunch of mugs that I use because there's, I don't need anymore. I've got one. It's perfect. I love it. And it sparks joy. So I'm happy. I bought that. Right. Sometimes we bring something into our house and every time we see it or touch it,

it will spark joy. And that's beautiful. But if we wind up with too many things where like, oh, that'll spark joy and that'll spark to it, we can't appreciate any of them. So have to be very selective on what we're allowing to come into our house to spark joy. Okay. Then next question. Does it have a place this is especially true for bigger items,

but even small ones really think through this, does it have a place? Do you have a place that is, that there's enough storage for it? Are you going to have to get rid of some things before you can bring that new item into the house so that you have room to store it? So like with kids' toys, there's some really cool stuff.

That's really big. I don't know if you guys know about the nugget, it's like the nugget couch. And when I first saw it, I thought it was really ridiculous. Honestly. I was like, why are people paying so much money? What's the big deal? Like just use couch cushions and build a Fort. Well, most of our couch curved cushions are like sewn to the couch.

So we can't really do that anyway. And we had an old loveseat downstairs in one of the two, like downstairs rooms. Like we have like a living room and a family room. So there's like two rooms. One of them has like a proper couch. One had like an old legacy that was kind of falling apart and gross. And so eventually I kept seeing the nugget and hearing about it.

Everyone always loved it. And I was like, okay, on a whim, I bought one. And I got rid of the, the, the love seat that we had. So it took its place. I had to get rid of a piece of furniture to bring in basically a new piece of furniture. That's our new little couch in that room.

And actually it was really great and really fun. And we might even get another one and we'll see, but it is actually really fun. So we have to think through, does it have a place there's so many things that I've passed on because I don't have a place for it. And one of the hard ones is when it's a gift, someone gives you something that's huge.

Like I don't have a place for this. I have to get rid of it. Now. Although in some cases we have figured out a way to keep it, but it has been a challenge. So Does it have a place don't bring it in if it does not have a place. And my last big piece of advice here is be aware of the good deal.

I am a sucker for a good deal. If something is on sale right now, and it's the lowest price it's ever going to be, and it'll serve me forever. Right. Really good marketing stuff. Or they're like, it'll be great forever. And you'll use it forever. And it's not that I regret those purchases necessarily, but I really have to be careful because I know myself to be someone who's like,

oh, but it's only this much money right now. And, and I'll be able to do this. And it's so great. And there have been times where I have regret and I'm like, I did not need that because I, I went straight to, oh, it's such a great deal. And I bought it because it was a great deal and I kind of skipped over all those other questions.

So Be aware of the good deal. Be aware. Okay. Let's run through those super fast again. Just so you have them. The first question was, do you like already have something that will serve the same purpose? The next question, will it spark new joy? Well, it spark joy and really it should be, will it spark joy continuously or it will.

It keeps sparking joy would probably have been a better way to work. Does it have a place if it does not physically fit in your home in a beautiful place? That is, that makes sense. And that can, it can be enjoyed. It's not right right now. It's not the right time to purchase it. It's not a good fit for your family right now.

Be aware of the good deal. Not all good deals are actually good deals. One thing I do, I don't think I'm going to be continuing to participate in prime day, but in the past for prime day, I, and same thing for black Friday and all of these, I will have a list ahead of time. Or like on prime day for like Amazon,

I have, I already have had like a wishlist created. So I'll check to see if anything on the wishlist is on sale that day and buy any of those things. But I don't go just looking at all the deals because you always see all these things. You're like, oh, and that's so great. That's so great. And that's so great.

And when I bought them the, before I realized I didn't need any of those, they weren't on my wishlist for a reason. I don't need them. I'm not using them. It was a waste of money. The good deal could be a waste of money. So, yeah. Oh, and so then I also like on black Friday, I'll have a list ahead of time.

Before way before black Friday ever comes. Like I often start making my black Friday list in like July, especially kind of the bigger ticket items that I'm like. I really do want this. And I want to see if it's a better deal on black Friday. So I'm going to wait until black Friday and see if it's a good deal then, because I don't need it immediately.

So I'll make a list of what I'm looking for on black Friday. And then if it's on sale on black Friday, I'll buy it. If those things on sale, I don't buy them. And I avoid looking at the massive amount of good deals, but often aren't really good deals. Okay. Takeaway. So consider your purchases very carefully. Usually It's not needed.

We can avoid spending a lot of money on curriculum or manipulatives or gifts for our kids or ourselves or whatever, by just really thinking through, do I already have something that will also serve the same purpose? Do I, does it spark joy continuously? Is it going to continue to spark joy every time I see it? Does it have a place? Am I just buying it because it's a good deal.

So really think through your purchases and let me know. How do you decide on the purchases that you're making Kimberlynn@DecodingLearningDifferences.com.



 

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